Make It Happen
Weekly Reading Topic for October 10, 2020:
Well, good morning, love! I just opened a Reading for you, my newsletter subscribers and here’s what I heard in answer to the following:
What do my readers most need to hear this weekend? What is the most important message to send to my beloved readers?
The answer was: “make it happen.”
What follows is your weekly reading, dearest one.
Weekly Reading │ Make It Happen
Q: What do we need to know about “make it happen?”
A: There is an upwelling of desire all over this planet as we close in on mid-October 2020. The desire for peace, health, relaxation, well-being, safety, comfort, happiness, and contentment.
Now, often that desire is showing up as Not What We Want. For example, the desire for peace may rise up in you in the form of “how can people react violently to this or that situation??”
Or the desire for health comes hidden deep under a Fear of Being Sick.
The wish for well-being and safety is manifest as a Worry Over How to Pay the Rent or Put Food on the Table.
At the bottom of every scary thought and “negative” emotion is a deep, simple desire for something that feels good.
Why bother looking at this, this weekend? Because it matters. How You Feel Is an Indicator of What Things Happen.
Now there is a woo-woo explanation for this that goes something like this: when you think about something with anything other than happiness, you are not “attracting” it. So stay relentlessly positive, folks, because otherwise, you are “creating things you don’t want to create.”
That’s an exhausting way to approach life. You can’t control your thoughts and feelings to the extent that is required to live up to these standards. Also, sometimes it is truly next to impossible to focus on feeling good about your health, for example, if you cannot breathe.
That’s why this attitude so often encourages a pernicious mental habit called spiritual bypassing.
Here’s a more nuanced, accurate, doable, and less mystical way to approach Making It Happen:
When you are feeling safe and healthy and comfortable and sated, relaxed and at peace, you are more likely to engage in open-minded thinking patterns. You are more likely to see Reality for what it is and to make the BEST choice available to you in the moment. And those little daily choices add up to larger trends in your life. You trend UP when you trend up because momentum matters more than desire!
Desire is great — but it’s not enough. And if you work yourself up into a frenzy trying to will your desire into manifest reality, you will get tired, and frustrated. And that will shut you down and you will start to feel bad, which will lead to less-than-optimal choices. And less-than-optimal choices tend to take you AWAY from what you want, not toward it.
If you look for a way to feel good — in any way — in the moment you’re in, you will be on your way to making it happen, even if you are not actively thinking about your desire.
And sometimes, in trying times, it’s something very small that can offer you a little sliver of feeling good. For example, just an extra twenty minutes of sleep might make a world of difference.
Example:
You choose to go to bed half an hour early > you wake up better rested than normal > you have a better meeting in the morning > you feel more accomplished and sure of yourself in your job or business > you can relax at lunch and have a nice conversation with your spouse or a friend > you feel more secure in your relationship > you arrive back at work feeling better than you did before lunch > you end the day with a clear heart and organized mind, having ticked off several important tasks > you socialize and relax in the evening and feel good > you notice you are tired and head off to bed at that same early hour > the next day is even better > repeat > repeat > repeat.
Counter-example:
You choose to stay up a little later than normal > you wake up less refreshed > you can’t quite get into the meeting and miss key points > you worry you are out of the loop > you spend your lunchtime reviewing the meeting, trying to figure out what happened > you arrive back at work feeling sluggish and insecure in your job and also irritated with your friend or spouse who tried to talk to you when you were so busy thinking about the morning meeting > you end the day with a muddled mind and worried heart, with few if any accomplishments to point to > you isolate in the evening and have an extra drink because you feel so down > you stay up later than normal trying to calm yourself down and thinking about how behind you are at work > the next day is even worse > repeat > repeat > repeat.
The easiest way to improve your life is to make a better choice at this moment than you did at the last moment. Tiny, incremental improvements that are consistently made are far more powerful than massive, life-altering changes that happen “overnight.”
[Ever hear the saying that overnight successes are twenty years in the making? This is why.]
We’re not here to tell you which choices to make — that’s your decision alone.
But we are here to tell you that the human mind and body functions best — and therefore YOU FEEL BEST — when the following is consistently true:
- You rise roughly with the sun and rest soon after it goes down.
- You hydrate your body an hour before meals so that when it’s time to eat you have enough water in the system to facilitate it. You then hydrate your body two hours after meals to replace the water used in digestion.
- You move everyday. We were born on the edges of great grassy plains, and we love to walk in the open. If you can, walk everyday for an hour or two. The greatest writers and thinkers walk for three to four hours a day.
- When you wake in the night, especially if you are following the sun, you assume it is for a reason other than insomnia. (It is, sometimes, but if you are giving yourself a full night’s sleep, it probably isn’t.) It may in fact be the body waking to take advantage of the dark of the wee morning hours, when we are stillest, and can best hear ourselves and our loved ones. This may be the best time to write, or work at deep things, or conceive a child.
- You spend some time in contemplation every day. For some this is reading, and for others it is praying, and for others, meditating. The form of contemplation is not as important as the consistency. Do it daily, it is that critical to the functioning of the mind, and body.
- You listen to yourself and your own counsel before taking other’s opinions or ideas on.
- Be like an investigator or intelligence agent: start with 0% trust for someone else. Add 10% of trust for everything they do that proves they are trustworthy. Only trust those who have SHOWN themselves to be trustworthy. Until then, withhold your judgment. This will help you to feel confident and relaxed in your relationships, because you will know that you protected yourself from disappointment as best you could.
- When asked for help or a favor, start mentally from a position of “no.” Then ask questions so you can discover reasons why you should change your mind and say “yes.” This will help you to feel joyful in your yes, and avoid regrets later.
- You listen to music every day. What kind of music? Whatever you enjoy listening to. Listen, and move. Dance, darlings, because that way lies freedom.
- You listen to your body and do as it requests. If you really treat your body like the intelligent being it is, you will “hear” its instructions and requests. Our cells do not give up on life — many live and keep living long after death comes — and they always make their needs known. If you feel yourself called to eat pumpkin seeds, or drink peppermint tea, or have a hot buttery slice of toast, do it. What we need changes from moment to moment, and there are no “right” ways to nourish ourselves. Every one of us has different needs from each other and from moment to moment. Give yourself what you need.
- You reach out to other humans for connection. We incarnated into bodies that are designed for physical and emotional and spiritual communion. Do not pass up the opportunity for deep conversation, fun adventures, and simple connections. Hold hands, hug, bring pies, gaze at clouds — together.
This is a challenging time, as we’ve been, um, noticing for a while now. Radically committing to yourself in every way will help you navigate these challenges and also Feel Good Even Though This Crazy Shit Keeps Happening.
And the more of us who feel good, and make good choices (little good choices moment by moment) the more of us will change the Crazy Shit.
As we said at the beginning, there is this upwelling of desire to feel good, all over the world. Even if it looks like anger or frustration with current circumstances, it’s Actually a Wanting to Feel Good.
And some folks don’t quite see how to feel good when they are trapped in unhealthy relationships, or food insecure, or sick. And that is why it’s important that we all do what we can to make small, everyday choices to feel a little better… so that we can help others do the same.
There are some illnesses that are chronic and must be cured over and over again. When they come back, was that a failed cure? No, it was just a cure for that version of the illness. The current version of the illness asks for a new cure.
The same is true of the human condition. What can you do to feel good at THIS moment, despite all the things that feel bad?
That question is repeated moment by moment throughout human life. It’s especially up right now.
And sometimes, when things are very dark, it can be hard to see how to “feel good” until circumstances change. But circumstances cannot dictate our wellbeing, dear ones. If they did, how could any of us ever feel good? Even most #blessed lives have trouble, illness, injury, accident, and hardship. If we have to solve every problem before we feel good, we’ll never get there.
So instead we have to find something, NOW, that feels good. We don’t have to think about what we want and yearn after it. In fact, if we’re yearning after what we want we’re not likely to get it. We won’t be able to Feel Good enough to make the series of small choices that will lead to a life More Likely to Include What We Want.
Or our yearning will distract us from noticing Things That Aren’t So Great About What We Want. We will stay in yearning, thinking that if we just get what we want, we’ll be happy … and then stay miserable forever while it doesn’t happen, or (maybe worse) realize once it does that it wasn’t what we wanted after all.
So to Make It Happen, whatever It may be for you, make a small choice, in the moment, that feels like the Best one you can make.
Take the time to respond to your friend’s email fully and with heart.
Put your phone down and listen to the birdsong.
Read a novel instead of watching the news.
Have a glass of water before dinner starts, even though you don’t feel thirsty.
Take a moment to reflect on your day before you go to bed.
Smile at your neighbor or the clerk in the store.
Walk up the stairs instead of taking the elevator.
Practice taking deep breaths when you notice anxiety rising.
Wear your favorite scent even though it’s just you at home.
Every moment, even those direst and Important, offers us at least two choices, and usually many more. Our Freedom and Liberty spring not from externals, but from our own authority over our choices. We have the right and the responsibility to our own pursuit of happiness. And if we pursue happiness as our rightful occupation, we will gracefully and surely make better and better choices, for ourselves and for others. We will also form a government that reflects these choices.
And that, friends, is how to thrive. Not by closing down and shutting out. By opening up, seeing the possibilities, and making the best choice at the moment …
… Knowing that every new moment will bring a new opportunity to choose again …
… On, and on, until we draw our last breath and withdraw our energy back into the consciousness we are all part of.
This weekend, and from now until that last breath, treat yourself and your body like a treasured, beloved child, an infant in arms who is innocent and lovely, and such a little miracle. Think of your son and your daughter, and know that is how we see you — complete and whole and perfect.
We all want, in the end, to be warm, cuddled, loved, and fed. Safe and dry and clean.
Give that to yourself, so you can give to others. Promise, that’s how we make the world lovely for all of us.
I appreciate you, and your attention, and your love.
I am always here to serve in any way I can.
Much Love to You,
Molly
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